Forgiven
by DreamMyFriend
Summary: Life after death for Stefan Salvatore.


I've been here before. This place holds countless memories, each one scratching away at my shell and working to expose what's really at my core: a guilt-ridden boy too fearful to own up to his mistakes. This is where it all started, therefore this is where_ I_ must start.

It's been years, centuries maybe, since I was_ really_ here. I don't remember anymore. Here, the seconds slip effortlessly into minutes, the minutes into hours, and the hours into countless days spent reliving past mistakes. Even after death, I can't seem to let go. I really don't think I deserve the ability to forgive myself.

The lawn is soft and lush, just the way it had always been during the warmer months. I remember as a child rolling through the grass at the first sign of spring. Things had been simpler then; they were pure and innocent, just like my love for my father and brother. I hadn't known about the dark at that time. I didn't know I would become part of it.

I lay back and stare at the sky, breathing slowly. The all too familiar scent of flowers brings a sweetness that makes my lips curve into a grin. I know I don't deserve to be here. I should be where the others are, along with every other creature of the night. How I ended up here, I don't know. But I see it as a second chance and embrace it. I might not be living, but here I can relive the memories from when I was. From what I understand, the other place doesn't allow that.

Of all the times I've been back here, I've never actually gone inside my childhood home, and my hands shake with anticipation and fear as I walk to the front door. I decide it's time to face my past faults and work through the guilt. I've hidden from it for so long... I don't know what I'll find. I never do.

The door creaks open and inside I find everything the way it was when I left it oh so long ago. The halls are dusty and lived-in, and my eyes start to water with a desperate yearning to go back to what I was as a child. Each step I take makes my chest squeeze tighter and tighter until finally I have to stop in front of my father's study.

I know what I'll find here.

Inside, my father lays on the floor, his eyes bewildered and desperate as he clutches at his chest. The stake is there, clear as day, and I see myself, a much younger and spirited me, run over to where he is. I hear him mumble things to my father and I see my father refuse. I see the blood-lust begin to take over and I watch myself lose whatever delicate and frayed sense of innocence I had left.

And then I'm seeing myself relive all wrong I've done. It happens quickly, each kill lasting only a few seconds, but the seconds seem to add up to hours, days,_ years_, maybe. I feel my stomach clench with each victim, and I start to feel nauseated and dazed.

Just when I feel like I can't take any more, it stops.

I find myself on the front lawn again, kneeling and clutching at my chest. My breaths come in ragged gasps and I let out a few sobs before finally wiping at my eyes and sitting back.

I've owned up to my mistakes now. Do I still feel regret? Of course. Regret will always be a part of my personality, but for the first time since arriving in this strange and mystical place that some call Heaven, I feel like I can finally let go.

I feel _free_.

"Stefan."

The sudden break of silence startles me, but when I see the speaker, I instantly relax. My mother walks over to me, and I feel my eyes brim with tears. I haven't seen her since the day she died, and that was a very, _very_ long time ago. She kneels down and puts her hands on either side of my face, an immense feeling of warmth flooding through me.

"You've finally forgiven yourself." She says calmly, and I nod. It may have taken me an extensive amount of time, but I have forgiven myself.

"Now," she says. "You can come home."

She stands up and begins walking back toward the house, but I stop.

"Who's inside?" I ask.

She smiles. "The people who care about you. You left them a very long time ago, and when their time came, they were happy to go. They forgave their past mistakes. They've been waiting for you to do the same."

"But… how are they…?"

I start to ask why it is they're here and not the other place, but I stop myself. I realize I don't really care. They're here, and that's what matters. I can finally see my friends- no, my _family_ again, and an excitement begins to grow in me.

I look ahead at my mother and smile back at her. Her green eyes meet mine, and I feel a flutter of happiness and anticipation.

"I'm home now, aren't I?" I ask happily.

Her eyes reflect my excitement as her lips break into a smile. "Yes," she says. "You're home."

* * *

_**Hey everyone! Not quite sure where the inspiration for this one came from, but I hope you guys like it. Please review and let me know what you think! (Honest feedback is much appreciated!) :)**_


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